“Real beauty is always marked by the passage of time: it dwells in time; its loveliness increases as the workings of age and the mysteries of continuing enhance it.”
David Deida
The above quote is from an unlikely source. David Deida wrote “The Way Of The Superior Man”. His book helped me formulate a sense of the radiance I desire to find within and to express. He goes on to say, “A woman’s true radiance reveals the degree to which she is open, trusting, connected and loving. Her capacity to love allows her body to be moved by the power of the life force. Herein lies the true nature of feminine radiance and power, far beyond the sexiness of a naive young woman.” His book is written to help men gain a better sense of who they might become and his notions of a complementary universe operating between men and women I found quite healing.
Somehow those thoughts led me to wonder once again about what I give up even as I reach for this new level of expressing inner radiance. I read somewhere that all suffering becomes bearable if it is seen as part of a story!
My story has a life of its own and sometimes I seem somewhat detached - like an investigative reporter! Writing this story of my metamorphosis, I find, thankfully, that suffering gives way more and more often and my sense of curiosity and hopefulness grows. The story has been a long one and yes, I am near the end. But doesn’t the element of intrigue grow stronger as the plot thickens? As I think about it, I have always adhered to a theory of some kind of Grand Design that is constantly unfolding in my life. This must be something like what an author feels as she watches the story take shape and take on a life of its own. Here is something I wrote about “The Grand Design” in 1983 just prior to following my muse and consequently shattering life as I knew it.
“If you clear out of the way (through self-knowledge and acceptance), of your other “voices” the clarity is there inside. The “Twist” is that in order to arrive at the Grand Design you must be willing to enjoy and appreciate the entire path – whether it goes up or down or round and round – it is the perfect path. Explore the path and enjoy it for it is uniquely yours. Release your resistance to its twisting and turning nature and suddenly you see – as if from above – the incredible design and elegance of its curves. All lines, fits and starts, waves and troughs, take on a beauty that is indescribable from a different view. Fall in love with your path and you naturally embrace your own life and truly use it for the vehicle that it is. Harmony and peace will be the friends you walk with down your path. With them along you will not notice the distance or the obstructions that will be encountered. You will simply do what is necessary to keep on walking. You can even walk off the path and lie down among the flowers near its edge when you are weary. For this too is of the path!”
Ah, what a reminder to trust myself and trust my experience. There IS an absolute integrity to the human experience! I WILL be led out of the woods!
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